Come to think of it.. From the moment I landed on my first job, it was fate, it was smooth, it was easy. I struggled a little bit for the next one but still considerably hopeful. Now I am challenged to get a job in a more difficult situation.
Even so, actually I had it tough too when I was looking for a job right after I graduated. Nobody seemed to want me. It was 2005, the oil and gas industry was down. A lot of my seniors landed in jobs outside of our expertise. I applied everywhere to no avail. I only got 1 interview. In the meantime, I earned some extra bucks working for my lecturer. But I didn't give up. I kept hope. In the end I decided to go for Master degree and off I went.
I don't know why I'm relatively feeling hopeless now. Maybe it's because I have kids, bills to pay, few choices, other plans ahead, etc. Plus I am so desperately fatigued. I feel like I really really need a job soon. Life isn't so free and easy now hahaha.
Life never goes the way we plan it to be. And when the going gets tough it really is difficult to keep faith and surrender fate. Even though sometimes that is all we need to do, surrender. And God will do the rest.
I am still applying for jobs. Making efforts, but deep inside I am very pessimistic. Maybe that's why nothing comes up. I don't know what I want, and I haven't surrendered fully.
Whatever happens, I must keep trying, be optimistic and surrender my fate to the Almighty. Whatever happens, happens for a reason.
